My 2013 Wedding Dress


Nah, I’m not getting married anytime soon. I’m as good at relationships as I am at cooking – and you should know that I consider fairly tolerable scrambled eggs my top culinary achievement to date. Anyway, were I planning to tie the knot, 2013 would a good year to do so. Firstly, because it’s finally becoming equal for all – at least in the UK, where I live, and in France, where couture lives. And secondly, because the runways have recently been swept with some absolutely astonishing white creations.

And I don’t mean any of the repetitive, strapless gowns that we could see during last week’s Bridal Fashion Week – an event that only Pinterest seems to take any interest in. I like my weddings unforgettable. <Horrible alcohol joke removed by self-censorship.> Just like these two works of bridal art, surprisingly made by the two most vanilla designers I can think of:

Zac Posen Spring/Summer 2013, Elie Saab Spring 2013 couture

Zac Posen Spring/Summer 2013, Elie Saab Spring 2013 couture

And when I thought I’ve decided to wear one of the above, and dress my potential partner (regardless of their gender) in the other, here comes Chanel with its ultra-romantic couture collection. I love the historical references, I love the drama, and I totally love the two brides that finished the show – that happened in January, when France was fighting over gay marriage.

Chanel Spring 2013 couture

Chanel Spring 2013 couture

Seeing these dazzling dresses, I sent marriage proposals to all of my celebrity crushes. Unfortunately, none replied so far – they must’ve been busy or something. Perhaps I should settle for the only person with whom I can be sure to stay until death and beyond?

Yes, that sounds like the best choice. Ladies and gentlemen, in 2013 I’m going to marry myself. In this cozy Celine self-hug dress. <Even worse self-love joke removed.>


Celine Fall/Winter 2013/14

Disclaimer: images of dresses found online. They don’t belong to me. Neither the pictures, nor the dresses. Booo!


4 thoughts on “My 2013 Wedding Dress

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